because you have faith...

Dear solid fan base,

There has to be at least 4 or so of you, that are still die hard.  For that I commend you.  You are the people that make this world a better place for all, in fact it is getting just downright wasteful sparing oxygen molecules for the rest of the earthly population.  Do you get as exited about world domination and class separation as I do at this point?  Of course you do, you've probably found yourself speeding and flipping people off a lot more than usual.  Don't be ashamed, you're only human.

A lot of people think that I've been too neglectful towards my supremely important blog.  I just want to clear the air, by reporting that although school has been a challenge, it is not the reason for my decrease in writing activity.  I have my priorities straight.  The real reason for the cut back, has more to do with budgeting and government grants, that I have yet to receive for providing such a quality education.  You see, at times I experience what some people refer to as "passion" or "overzealous-behavior".  Yes, it is true, I have been caught sitting on the couch cursing at the laptop from time to time.  Occasionally, I tense up so much while I'm typing, that I literally press the keys straight through the keyboard.  Exit wound and all.  This is a type of situation, that can't be undone.  When such passion provokes this sort of destruction it becomes very expensive (Especially if you have a laptop and the keyboard, now needing replacement is directly attached to the computer.).

So in order to save product, I've taken to using a keyboard with a 20 foot range.  This way I also avoid punching the screen.  The sad ending here is while trying to reduce destruction to my computer, I've also lowered my level of anger and blood pressure.  I still use up the same untapped energy, only I take it out on a 5 lb. bag of cinnamon bears, or Red Vines.  Not having that anger, to constantly stir up the voices of irrational thought and chaos, leaves me a little short for words in times that they are most needed.  Any psychologist would probably refer to this as a positive outlet.  But how could any of this be positive, when at least 4 people are relying on me?  I've said it before, I'm no martyr or savior, but I am here to offer the best of me.

So I thought about going back to close-range typing.  Once Wifey caught wind of this, it was immediately vetoed.  And because I choose not to type in a dark closet, in order to avoid her all-seeing eyes, I know I need some form of controversy.  So I've devised a plan.  This is going to involve some help from my fans, but I'm sure it will work.  The cure I ask for, to fuel me up is hate mail.  I know my most faithful fans couldn't find it in them to even set their minds in a state of anger or contempt for me, but I'm sure you have friends who could.  So I need you to seek out the people in your lives, that truly detest people like me (You probably don't even have to leave the house to do this.).  Invite these haters to visit my site and comment.  I'm sure that some angry words will really bump up my game.  It will also bump up your game, when you find yourself delivering personal jabs in attempt to defend the website that makes all things clear to you.

It's either hate mail or I skip my meds for a week, but I'm pretty sure that society is not ready for that.

Chase 'em down...

Trails of dreams...

I've spent over an hour trying to add facebook commenting to this blog.  I followed directions from other blogs.  I read blog.  I input code.  I read blog.  I cursed several times while trying to input code.  I read blog.  I bang head against wall.  In the end there is a code written, so somewhere on my blog there is an imaginary comment box that you can use with your facebook account.  (Still cursing in my head)

What does the internet offer?  A series of illogical explanations describing the patterns of life that are said to bring us to the tip of Maslow's pyramid, where we will experience nothing but euphoria.  Unfortunately, if you've every climbed a pyramid (I haven't by the way, but I could imagine it)  you would arrive at the top drenched in sweat and grateful that the journey's over.  There is no end to the world wide web of half-truths.  Thus, we walk around like zombie's every day trying to consume our way to the top.  Maybe we're only circling pyramids, because we've lost all sense of gravity. I'm getting dizzy just thinking about it.  The words are actually unraveling in my head at this point and spilling onto the screen.  If I could find a reason to sleep I would, but there is a force (not gravity) sucking me into this flat screen in front of me.  

If you're confused at this point you can imagine what I fill like after staring at pages of codes.  It's like looking at a foreign language for the first time y no entiendes nada, las palabras se escriten de manera clara, pero mis ojos no las reconocen.  Let me just give you a moral and we can wrap it up for the night:

All you need to know-  Abraham Maslow had a crappy childhood with psycho parents, that would make all these tight jean wearing emo kids, grateful for their mostly normal parents.  Although when you see a kid so desperate to stand out that he buys jeans out of the little girls' section, it makes you wonder...I'm getting of track again.

So I'm going to pace myself and if I can't figure it out, I'll try later (I'm talking about the comment box again).  I'd rather be content than have the pissed off dialogue, that speaks 3 dialects with 8 different accents, in my head.

Food for thought, eat it up...